Surgeon

We didn't really find anything out at the Plastic Surgeon other than he is not in our network. Which means that we will have to pay 20% of the costs. However, he works like an in network doctor in that they take the insurance company write off. So, we only have to pay 20% of what the insurance company says it should cost. I swear, Addison is only a month old and she is already trying to break the bank. It can only be downhill from here. : ) I just have to keep reminding myself that this could be so much worse, and Matt and I are fortunate that he has a good job so this will not be the financial burden that it could be.

They are now saying that they will do the surgery between 6 and 8 mos. I am really hoping for 6mos. The sooner the better.

Regan and I went to playgroup for the first time in a long time. It is so nice to have the babysitter to keep Addison and to help me with feedings. But I also have gotten to nap for the past two days when Regan napped while she kept watch over the baby. I feel a little spoiled, because I know I am getting more sleep than most mom's of two right now.

Story Time

Sometimes Addison joins us for storytime, and tonight was one of those nights.

Tummy Time

Addison did her first "tummy time" this morning. She doesn't seem to mind it like her sister did. Regan used to start to fuss almost immediately when you would put her on her tummy. Addison stayed for several minutes before she started to fuss. Regan told me that she needed "to read to my baby sister." She never actually read to her, but had the prayer book open and flipping through the pages.

Regan loves my prayer book. I don't know if it is because it is red or if it is just because it is my book, but she loves it. I even read a whole service to her one day and she sat and listened. Maybe she is destined to do something in the church. She loves Veggie Tales, too.

Matt took Regan to New Orleans yesterday for Quinn's birthday party. He forgot the camera, so sorry no pictures. I think it was exhausting for both of them. Matt has never taken her on a trip by himself. Apparently she wasn't very pleasant on the way home. It's a long trip to make in one day. I have done it many times, but it is long. It's much easier to go for the weekend, but we won't be doing that for a while. I think she had fun at the party, though. She was very excited to go to the party I know for sure. She asked Matt all morning "can I go to Quinn's birthday party, please." She loves her cousin Quinn.

Eczema

My grandparents were here this weekend. Pop thinks that Addison looks like him, which makes since because I kind of think that she looks like Aunt Carla. But I wasn't sure if it was just because of the hair. Maybe this means that one of my children will look like me. Not that I think that I look like either one of them, but at least they are in my family.

Matt took Regan to the doctor this morning for her skin. She has these little bumps all over her trunk that she has been scratching. It is mild Eczema, and they gave her a cream for it. If it's not one thing..... I'm actually glad that is all it is. Eczema seems to be pretty common.

I also sent him with a list of questions for Addison. The most important one being whether or not we could add a powdered formula to my milk for Addison instead of continuing to use the human milk fortifier. When we first started her on it everyone kept saying how expensive it was. We didn't really pay attention, because she wasn't taking that much milk and we of course want what we think is best for our child. Well, now we are using four packs per feeding and the cost is starting to add up. We have gone through 200 packs in a week, and it cost $168 for a box of 150. Now we know why everyone kept saying it was expensive. The dietician in the hospital said that we could add the powdered formula, and it would do the same thing. Matt asked the pediatrician this morning, and he said that was fine. Whew! Matt said he was also pleased with her weight, which is 9 lbs. 3 oz.

I think I have found a "mother's helper." That is what they are called when they are only helping you with the children. There is a little girl in Regan's music class that has a nanny. The little girl has been in Regan's music class the whole time we have been in, and the nanny has always brought her. I asked her last class if she knew anyone that would be interested in part time nanny work. Turns out her sister was a teacher and went to work for FEMA for a year in New Orleans, and is now looking for a teaching job for next fall. So, it seems like the perfect situation. I need someone until the summer, and she needs a job until the summer. The only thing would be if she finds something that pays more. She comes on Thursday, and I think I am probably going to hire her. I think it is mostly going to help me to stay sane. Especially since we don't have family near by.

One Month Old

Addison is one month old today. One month down and five more to go before her surgery. I have attached a picture of Regan at one month old for comparison.

My grandparents are here visiting, which has been nice. Especially because as soon as Sue left Regan started saying "I need my Granny." Pop and Lil has been a nice distraction for her. Even if she was bouncing off the walls last night, because she was so excited.

It seems that chaos ensued after Sue left. Addison decided to pull her feeding tube out right before her 11pm feeding. She had tried earlier in the day with no success, but apparently she is like her sister in that she does not give up. We talked to the home health nurse and the pediatrician on call. Both assured me that she would be fine until the morning. Then we either slept through the alarm or it didn't go off. Either way Addison went six hours without a feeding, instead of the three that she is supposed to. I don't know how long she would have slept, because we were still the ones to wake her up. Luckily she was still 8lbs. 11oz., which is what she was the morning before. So, technically she didn't lose any weight. However, when we weighed her last night she was 8 lbs. 14oz. But it will be our little secret.

Sue called today and she has no gas. Apparently her neighbors yard guy hit the gas line and they came out and took her meter. So, now she can't come back until that is taken care of. Yikes! My grandfather has a meeting on Monday, so they can't stay longer. I think I can do everything except take Regan to school. Matt said he would handle it this week. I think we are going to look into hiring someone to help me until after the surgery. As much as I hate to spend the money, I think it will give me piece of mind. Especially because until this problem is fixed we don't know what we will encounter. We have no idea how long we will have the feeding tube.....etc...

Alone

Sue went home for the weekend today, and I did the tube feeding for the first time without someone in the near vicinity to call for help. We survived. She did try to pull her tube out. I saw the number 18 on the tube, and the 20 should be right by her nostrel. I was able to push it back in, and it was still in her tummy. Crisis averted. I also forgot to put her antibiotics down the tube, and tried to do it by mouth. Big mistake. But we got through it. Regan was sleeping, so that helped a lot.

Weight Gain

Addison is up 5 ozs. since we came home from the hospital. Her weight now is 8 lbs 9 oz. Yay!!! It is a team effort to get her fed, but we are getting it done. If she cries during her feeding tube feeding the milk won't go down, so sometimes one of us is holding her and the other is holding the syringe. Usually she is good, though. It's nice to have help either way, because it would be a lot to handle on my own.

I had to take her back to the hospital today for an echo. They heard a heart murmer when we were in the hospital, and did an echo then, but the vcr wasn't working. Which means the cardiologist can't look at it. They didn't see anything the first time, and they didn't tell me anything today.....so I am assuming that everything is still fine. They said the pediatrician would have the results in a couple of days.

In other news....knock on wood....Regan is napping again. Only for about 40 minutes at a time, but at least she is sleeping a little.

Things are looking up. : )

Hospital

I'm sorry that I haven't posted in so long. For those of you who don't know, Addison was admitted to the hospital on Thursday. She had only gained two ounces in a week, when a baby her age should be gaining an ounce a day. So, they sent us straight to the hospital and I have not seen the light of day until today when we were released.

The first night she gained four ounces, and they thought we would be able to go home on Saturday. But then she lost an ounce on Saturday and an ounce on Sunday. Needless to say it was frustrating, but we are becoming slightly numb to it at this point. The pediatrician on call told us on Sunday to start increasing her volume. When they first admitted us we were doing 20 minutes on the bottle and whatever she didn't take from the bottle less 60 ml we were giving her through the feeding tube. This was every three hours. She was acting hungry every two hours, and the first night I had fed her on demand (which is what you do when you nurse) and they fussed at me saying I was giving her to much. That I had to wait every three hours. They said that if she is acting hungry it could be a tummy ache making her do that and if I overfed her she would throw up, and we would be defeating the purpose. One of the times that I fed her she did throw up, so I listened to them. But I knew she was hungry before the three hours were up. I didn't think that a baby would have a tummy ache at exactly the same time after every feed. It has been much better since the ped. told us to increase her volume. We went up to 75 ml at first, and she did fine but was still hungry before her next feeding. And then we went up to 90 ml. She did fine the first time we gave her 90 ml, but then the next time she spit up a little bit and was a little fussy so we went down to 80 ml. With all of that she finally gained weight. I would have been really worried if she hadn't. Today she started to act hungry again before her appointed feeding time, so we went up to 85 ml and so far she has done well with that. Having nursed Regan we are having to learn all of this, plus all of the extra medical things that go along with it. I have no idea how much a baby this age normally takes, and I have no reference point. I am considering going to medical school. : )

We are home now with the feeding tube. We will have a home health nurse come in three days a week to make sure that she is gaining and that her feeding tube is still in the right place. We check it everytime we feed her, but it is reassuring that we will have a professional checking it also. One of our neighbor's little boy had four holes in his heart and had to have open heart surgery. Needless to say, he had trouble gaining weight in the beginning of his life too. They were actually at the hospital at the same time that we were, because he had an extremely high fever. Matt ran into them at the coffee shop. They said that they actually owned a baby scale from when their little boy was having the same problems, and that we could use it. We are so greatful! It will give us great piece of mind to be able to weigh her every day. The pediatrician also seemed happy that we would have this. He wants her to gain 20 to 30 grams a day.

Regan seems to have handled this as well as a 2 1/2 year old can be expected to handle this kind of thing. She was a little hyper when we got home, but nothing that wasn't to be expected. She did ask us right before she went to sleep if we were "all done with the hospital." We told her that we were, and she went right to sleep. I think she is glad to have us home.

We got a lot of calls while we were in the hospital from friends and family that were concerned about us and Addison. Thank you all for all of your thoughts and prayers. It means so much to us. Also, we could not have better neighbors. They were so kind to come and take Regan to play and give Sue a little break. They are always willing to help as are our other friends out here, and we are very appreciative. One doesn't know how nice it is to have people to count on in times like these. Which brings me to my final thank you. We could not do this without Matt's mom Sue. She has been so wonderful to stay with us and help us during this time. We are so greatful!! It really does take a village!

Daddy time

Today Addison and I were alone together for the first time. We thought Regan started back to school today, so Matt's mom took her. Turns out she doesn't start back until Thursday.

Addison goes back to the doctor to be weighed on Thursday. Everyone keep their fingers crossed.

Regan is having trouble sleeping these days. We put her in her bed for her nap, and she doesn't ever go to sleep. She plays for a couple of hours and then we end up getting her down, because it is close to 4 o'clock. I don't know what to do other than keep putting her in there. At least she is trapped, and I can get some rest. Hopefully this is a short phase that won't last long. I think she is to young to give up her nap. Although, she isn't really cranky at night. Who knows?

Marriage Proposal

Regan and I went down to our neighbor's house today to play, and before we left Regan got a marriage proposal. Her little friend Christian told me that when he gets bigger he is going to marry Regan. So cute! I have posted a picture of him from Halloween last year. He is the one in the woody costume. Although he might have some competition from the other little boy pictured, Spencer, because the last time he saw Regan he squeezed her shoulders and said "You are so pretty Regan."

Just Good News

We took Addison to the doctor today and her white blood cell count was down and she had gained an ounce. We don't go back again for a week. Yay!

Good News and Bad News

We went to the doctor today, and Addison gained three ounces. Huge relief! But she has an ear infection and a slightly elevated white blood cell count. She is more prone to ear infections due to her cleft pallet. Since she was not running a fever, they gave her a shot of antibiotics and we have to go back tomorrow. They talked of admitting her, so I guess if her white blood cell count doesn't come down by tomorrow they will admit her. I call Addison my little trouble maker.

Bath Time

Well, we didn't get a picture of Addison's first bath. Didn't even occur to us. Poor second children. I guess by the third child they just don't even get a picture to document. She, of course, did not enjoy the bath. And her big sister was a little to much help, but we all survived. I don't remember Regan minding her bath, but that was a long time ago. I know that Addison will learn to love bath's just like her big sister.

Christmas

We had a really nice low key Christmas. It was nice to have Regan home to get all of her Santa and to be able to play with it. We let her play with her Santa presents for a while, and then we opened our wrapped gifts. Regan liked opening presents. She didn't really care who they were for. It's so nice when they are young and innocent. I think she liked all of her presents, but she played with her doodle pro and bitty baby the most. It was really surprising to me, because she is not really into babies. She is much more into stuffed animals. But she didn't pay much attention to the TMX Elmo (who is hilarious, by the way). She was very into changing her babies diapers and feeding her, though. She really wanted to play with the play doh create a center, but at our house play doh is an outside toy and today was not a day to go outside.

Sisterly Love

Church

We took Regan to church this morning for the first time since our nephew, Reid's christening. Addison stayed home with my mom. I have to say, Regan did really well. She was pretty good about whispering, and she really liked the music. She did keep saying "What are you guys saying, Mommy." But for a two year old, I figured as long as she was whispering the majority of the time we were doing well. We don't take her very often, because in the past she has been distracting for us and for people around us. Since she is not keen on strangers, the nursery is not an option for her. Of course, we pick one of the worst days weather wise to go. It was really cold and rainy and we got there early and I was thinking it was going to be a disaster with Regan and part of me wanted to tell Matt we should just go get coffee. But I thought, well we will try it and if it doesn't work out we can sit close to the door and make a speedy exit. Matt and I were really glad that we braved it. With all that is going on, we can use all the spirituality that we can get. And it was an added bonus that our child was well behaved.

Weight Loss

We took Addison to the pediatrician to get weighed yesterday, and she had lost an ounce. This is since Monday. I immediately started crying. Obviously, all of this is very stressful and my hormones are not helping. The doctor didn't seem that concerned, though. He said everything else with her looks good. He is giving her until Tuesday to gain some more weight. If she loses again, I think they will admit her to figure out what is wrong. In the mean time we are doing everything we can to get her to gain weight. We have (with the pediatrician's okay) started putting two packets of human milk fortifier in her bottle. This is especially frustrating, because she is eating more and we were convinced that she had gained. Now she is eating even more. Matt says that if she hasn't gained by Tuesday he wants them to admit her, because something is obviously wrong. One of the worst parts is I am not even looking forward to Christmas. I just want Tuesday to get here and for my baby to have gained weight.

Back to Work

Matt goes back to work tomorrow, so we will be down a pair of hands. He is only working tomorrow and Friday and then not again until the new year. I think we will be okay. I know Regan likes having him home, so I am interested to see how she does tomorrow with him not here. I am really starting to get the hang of this whole pumping and bottle feeding thing. It remains to be seen how it will be with just me and the girls, but all I can do is try. My main concern right now is there is a huge outbreak of RSV this year. Very scary!

Our refrigerator is broken, again! This is the third time in a little over two years. I was on the phone for a long time today with Maytag arguing with them over paying for service, because the warranty has expired. I had to call someone to come out, because Conn's Appliance (where we bought it) uses Sears service and Sears wouldn't come out because it was a "cash call." The parts are still under warranty, just not the labor. I just don't think that a refrigerator should break once in two years, much less three. So, I called someone and payed $65 for them to tell me that it is not an easy fix....at least $500...and that he couldn't fix it because he can't warranty parts and he would void the warranty if he fixed it. So, now I have to call someone tomorrow that can warranty the parts. It is still freezing, it is just not consistently cold throughout....so, for example, our ice cream is soft. So far, it was keeping my stored milk frozen....but the guy said he wouldn't trust it. If I lost all of that milk it might just send me over the edge, so I called my neighbor and she is keeping it for me until I can get it fixed. Thank goodness for good neighbors is all I can say!

Christmas Dresses

Regan had her Christmas Party at school today, and wore her Christmas dress. Quite possibly the only time she will wear it. I normally would have put her in tights, but it is 80 degrees outside and I didn't want her to pass out from heat stroke. I guess fashion before comfort doesn't apply when you are 2 1/2. Addison is wearing Regan's Christmas dress, which is actually a 6 month but the neck size is the same as a newborn so I put it on her. I think she looks cute. : ) Gotta love those bishop collars.

Aunt Carla and Dick stopped by on their way home from Dallas to see the girls. We exchanged Christmas Presents and had a nice visit. It was short as they had to get back on the road, but it was really nice to see them.

Matt's Christmas party was tonight. It was nice to have a night out, and a really nice party. Everyone was impressed that I was there, but I really feel fine. A few pounds heavier than normal, but fine. I think we are getting adjusted to the pumping and bottle feeding, and Addison is gaining weight. So, we are all doing really well all around. It is nice to have Matt and my mom here to help me. I worry about when I am by myself with the girls. I know there will be an adjustment period, I just wonder how long it will last.

Home

We are home from the hospital. It is nice to be home, but I can already see that life is going to be a lot more chaotic. At least for a little while.

Addison is having some issues that we are having to deal with. She was born with a cleft pallet, which is making it harder for her to nurse. They wanted to supplement her with formula from the beginning, but I was against it. So we came up with a compromise of nursing her and if she wasn't able to nurse then I would pump and we would give it through a surrenge. That worked well for a few days. She was latching on well and they were happy with her progress. I was happy, because she was doing so much better than Regan did at that age. Well, then my milk came in. She and I had a challenging day of trying to figure out what would work for us as far as latching on. Just when I felt like we had gotten it figured out, the doctor came and said she had lost to much weight and wanted to again supplement her with formula. I again resisted. So, now the new plan is for me to nurse her for a short amount of time and then pump the rest. The doctor wants her to get two oz. of breast milk every three hours, and we are adding a human milk fortifier that they give to preemies to give it some added calories. The only way to ensure that she gets two oz. every three hours is through a bottle. It is a little challenging, but I think once we get in the routine of it we will be okay and worth the effort. At least I hope so.

The other issue is Addison failed her hearing test. We have been told not to worry, yet. Apparently it is very common in c-section babies to have a lot of fluid in their ears and fail. We go back in two - three weeks to have it checked again. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers that all goes well.

On the upside we have a new beautiful little girl. Regan seems excited to be a big sister and eager to help. When we were taking the picture of her holding Addison, she was very much the proud big sister. She told Addison to "look at Daddy." The cleft pallet is very mild, and can be fixed with one surgery once Addison is about six months old. It isn't visible unless you look in her mouth. Also, Regan never took a bottle once she was three months old (which was stressful for me) and now we don't have that concern with this one. : )